Play hookey, pay the price

Maybe I'm just paranoid (surely not), but why is it that there have been THREE funerals in as many days this week?  Am I missing something?  The church bells have been clanging non-stop, and throngs of black-clad, bedirndled and lederhosened mourners have been blocking traffic and eating post-funereal schnitzel in equal proportions.  Naturally my heart goes out to the bereaved, but still, one has to consider the already small number of people residing in this village and hope that some more stork deliveries are pending, before it's just us and the neighbours and a lame duck left. CG and I ran past a little procession yesterday, a cluster of acolytes and a priesty-looking person, swinging incense and looking very serious.  I felt disrespectful in my blue nylon shorts and zebra t-shirt.  Comforted, though, that Herr and Frau NN seemed not to be acquaintances of the deceased; they have remained stolidly at home, going about their daily business of polishing geraniums, snipping at the lawn with nail scissors and checking that the world is going by at an appropriate pace.

Quick change of tack to lighten the tone.  Well, sort of.  The summer holidays are about to commence, and tomorrow is therefore the last day of school until mid-September.  As you can imagine, the roads and airways will be packed (ha - get it?) on Saturday, so some wily holiday-makers will no doubt have attempted to evade the rush and slipped off this afternoon.  Woe betide them if they are travelling with their school age children!!! I heard on the radio this morning that it is a criminal offence to miss the last day of term, even though the kids are only in school for one hour.  My trusty source - I glean a lot of information from this channel - went on to say that there are even police waiting at the airports to catch potential offenders.  If the unfortunates are unable to provide proof of permission from the school, they may be liable for a fine of up to one thousand euros!!!!   I nearly crashed the car when I heard this.  Apparently, though, one might be lucky, if one's headteacher is of a particularly lenient, kind nature, and if one has a suitable excuse, for example, Grandma's 80th birthday party.  (How convenient that her birthday falls on this very day!  Don't forget to supply birth certificate.) Mostly, however, schools take a very dim view of this kind of behaviour, and in a way I can understand this, while finding the fine a little extreme.  There always has to be a last day, for if they were continually removed the result would be, in this case, that nobody goes to school at all.  And then what would happen?  The country would go to the dogs.  German Shepherds, naturally.